Jhnen V: rikki is generally drunk.

Jhnen V: on ham.

Jhnen V: christmas hams from several seasons back.

Aaron A.: It’s sick, isn’t it. Ham drunks.

Aaron A.: He just tears the top off and guzzles the liquefied innards.

Jhnen V: he ages them in barrels he buries under his yard.

Jhnen V: then, when it rains, he burrows, naked, into the mud and brings up his rotting booty.

Aaron A.: Giggling the whole time. Full of pig-glee.

Jhnen V: it’s a horrifying scene to anyone who happens upon it.

Aaron A.: He likes when his own bodily juices mix with the ham.

Jhnen V: So he’s in there, twisting and writhing while just letting everything go into the mix…sweat, blood, piss and shit.

Jhnen V: stirring it up with his contortions.

Aaron A.: His juices age it ten years all at once. It’s important to age it like a fine wine.

Jhnen V: when the feeding is done, he just curls up there, the mud covering him, and drying as the day comes. He goes into a sort of torpor until the next ham season.

Jhnen V: sometimes, he is found by miners who break open rocks, only to find a still-living rikki in there, ravenous and screaming.